Stupid Football Commentators, #1

I think I am going to write down some of the just plain preposterous things I hear commentators say when I am watching football.

From this week's Badger game:

"If there is a better defensive lineman out there than (player X), he doesn't exist."

I call this phenomenon "subject-predicate brain schism." Color commentators often start a sentence only to change their mind midstream as to where they are going, leading to a predicate that doesn't follow from the subject. In this case, he probably meant to say "If there is a better D lineman, I don't know who he is." Somewhere along the way, he decided that was not emphatic enough.

I guess that's a general phenomenon, too.